Thor
25 September 2018
T
11:33
Thor
Like dude
11:33
I respect myself way too much to let anyone treat me this way.
L
11:34
Lyric
Being horny wasn't all it took.
11:34
I felt like I could never amount to anything of worth compared to you
11:35
You always know what to do but I'm just a mess that tumbled into your life
T
11:35
Thor
Oh are we going to go into the specific reasons why you went fishing with me already on the line?
L
11:35
Lyric
What am I supposed to think about myself other than being a nervous wreck with nothing to show for
11:35
And no, we aren't
T
11:35
Thor
I have an idea
11:36
How about act like your namesake
L
11:36
Lyric
And what would that be?
T
11:37
Thor
You pride yourself on bring a dog but im not seeing the loyalty
11:37
Fix that, maybe we'll talk when you do.
L
11:38
Lyric
Alright. I'm here for you no matter what.
T
11:38
Thor
No you're not.
L
11:38
Lyric
Even if I don't deserve your trust, I want to help you.
T
11:38
Thor
Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's raining.
11:39
If you were here for me we wouldn't be having this conversation.
L
11:39
Lyric
I could have texted you more.
11:39
In all honesty I was intimidated by you.
T
11:40
Thor
You could have not fucked your friend too but here we are.
L
11:40
Lyric
Maybe you would think I'm too naive
11:40
Maybe you would find it weird if I kept being obsessed about you
T
11:41
Thor
No, I thought you were sweet, creative, passionate, and dedicated. Now you just come across as a user.
L
11:41
Lyric
Maybe I'm none of those things.
11:42
I'm sorry to disappoint.
T
11:42
Thor
The fuck are you even talking about
11:42
You sound like you're high or dissociating
11:43
God damn what the fuck is wrong with everyone around me.
11:44
Also you can't blame you fucking your friend on me by saying you were intimidated by me.
L
11:44
Lyric
I'm not.
11:44
As I said, there's no excuse, I'm sorry, and I regret it.
11:44
You specifically asked for reasons so that's why I said it.
11:45
I'm none of those things you want me to be, Thor, I'm just a dog. And that's all I'll ever be.
T
11:45
Thor
You gave a bunch of vague ass answers that don't have context or meaning.
11:45
And you're not a dog.
11:45
You're a fucking human that can't keep his dick in his pants.
L
11:46
Lyric
I don't know what reasons you're looking for then
11:46
You want me to paint the scene for you?
11:47
I don't mean to be rude but I seriously don't know what you expect for an answer.
T
11:47
Thor
Honestly I'm lashing out because you blindsided me with this and it broke my fucking heart dude. I don't open up to people I don't engage in relationships. Fuck my community doesn't even know i'm a gay furry.
11:48
I made it pretty fucking clear that I was interested.
11:48
And you fucked a friend claimkng you didn't know and you never even asked me.
L
11:48
Lyric
... I seriously didn't catch on. Partly because we fucked on day 0, I figured that was the norm.
T
11:48
Thor
Yet you didn't ask
11:49
Notice how I asked if you went after somone else?
11:49
Know why?
11:49
Because your pattern of behavior changed and that usually means... well this.
11:49
Pretty fucking obvious
L
11:49
Lyric
I'm not after anyone else...
11:49
This dude and I have been friends for a long time and would never date and we recognize that
11:50
of course that doesn't make what I did any less repulsive
11:50
But I just wanted to clarify
T
11:50
Thor
Doesn't matter you lusted after him and changed the way you acted to me.
11:51
And the "I didn't know" defense makes zero sense here
11:51
considering our interactions
11:51
and you saying you love me all the time
11:51
Like
11:51
Whh jeapordize that if you love me?
11:51
The hells the point?
L
11:52
Lyric
I can guarantee that any change in manner toward you is because of other circumstances
11:52
I think you're misattributing the cause and effect here
T
11:56
Thor
Of course I am
11:56
I'm emotional and hurt
11:56
I was already having a bad time and now I found out the boy I like was e-fucking his friend instead of me.
11:56
Feels pretty fucking bad man.
L
11:57
Lyric
I didn't mean anything by it...
11:57
I'm sorry I've been busy lately.
T
11:57
Thor
Well it means a lot to me.
11:57
I don't give a shit about the busy lately part right now.
11:57
I give a shit about you fucking other people while claiming you love me.
L
11:58
Lyric
If I could take it back, I would.
11:59
I don't know what to tell you other than I'm sorry and I wouldn't let it happen again.
T
12:01
Thor
But how can I trust that you won't?
L
12:02
Lyric
I don't know what I could do other than give you my word
12:02
Which uh doesn't seem to be a great solution right now
T
12:03
Thor
Your word has a pretty bad exchange rate currencywise right now.
L
12:04
Lyric
Yeah—
12:05
I uh
12:05
screwed up...
12:06
I never wanted to hurt you and I never wanted you to feel like I wasn't interested
12:07
I should have made more time for you
12:07
I shouldn't have done anything with someone else regardless of circumstance
12:08
I've let you down and I'm sorry
12:09
I don't expect forgiveness, but at the very least I want you to know that I wasn't trying to throw you any hints or be shady about any of it
12:11
And if you can't rely on me as a mate I want you to still be able to rely on me as a friend.
T
12:21
Thor
Well, your words are increasing in value at least.
L
12:22
Lyric
I'm glad. Because I mean each one.
T
12:23
Thor
Hey look, my message to the community worked
L
12:29
Lyric
Just read it, nice post ^^
12:31
Good to see you having those high viewer counts again
T
12:46
Thor
Yeah
L
12:49
Lyric
T
12:54
Thor
L
13:01
Lyric
ono
13:01
*pat pat* uwu 💝
13:01
Having a rough time? Or just tired?—
T
13:02
Thor
Upset over the stuff with us
13:02
Not sure what to do
L
13:06
Lyric
I'm sorry for making it rough on you, please let me know if I can make it up to you somehow. ^^;
T
13:08
Thor
See that's not really on me?
13:08
Like
13:08
If you want this
13:08
Then you need to start trying things
13:08
To prove it
L
13:10
Lyric
Yeah... You're right.
13:10
And the first step for me is being around for you more.
T
13:10
Thor
It's not really fair to be like "Oh hey I fucked up but if you want to solve it let me know!"
L
13:12
Lyric
You're right...
13:12
I'm sorry for trying to put that on you.
13:17
I hope the stream is doing well so far—
T
13:17
Thor
Yep around 85
L
13:18
Lyric
woah that's a whole bunch—!
13:18
More than I've ever seen since I started watching
T
13:21
Thor
The thing is the majority of our community is positive and silent.
13:21
We had an uprising of fucking asshole children
13:21
Now that they're gone
13:21
And I let the goodies know their views matter
13:21
It's back to normal for now
13:21
This is why we got partnered
13:21
Because we average 80-100
L
13:26
Lyric
I guess that's how it is with most communities, that the majority tends to be positive and silent ^^;
T
15:16
Thor
Yep
15:16
Been 80+ for over 3 hours
L
15:36
Lyric
That's awesome :0
15:45
Hopefully I'll be home soon and will be able to watch too, though it should already be open on my browser :p
T
17:06
Thor
muhhh
17:06
me bed niw
17:06
so tire
17:07
About earlier stuff
17:07
just
17:07
find some5hing you know i like
17:07
and just do it for a bit
17:07
give me a reason to trust
L
17:33
Lyric
thanks for the advice... uwu
17:33
*nuzzles you in your sleep*
L
21:28
Lyric
you're up .o.
T
21:34
Thor
muhhh
21:34
4.5 hours sleep
21:34
eyes burny
L
21:39
Lyric
awh...
21:41
*nuzzles...* I know you'll get through it~! But you should consider trying to get more sleep >w<
T
21:42
Thor
mawr
L
21:42
Lyric
*sits on the floor next to you and watches you do cool dev stuff, watching intently* .o.
T
21:46
Thor
*pats your head*
L
21:46
Lyric
*wag wag wag*
21:46
Oh speaking of game dev I got game maker studio recently :0
21:47
and wOW i suck
21:48
but i'm learning. u//w//u
T
21:49
Thor
Everyone sucks at first.
21:49
Also
21:49
When I said I really wanted more attention
21:49
This is literally what I was asking for
L
21:49
Lyric
oh—
21:49
hecc this is so easy and fun~! ^^
21:50
i could just sit here forever— *closes my eyes to your pats and swishes my tail back and forth*
T
22:10
Thor
What did you think I meant when I asked that? c.c
L
22:11
Lyric
I... guess I didn't really know. uwu
22:11
But it felt like it was supposed to be obvious so I didn't wanna ask and seem stupid.
22:12
But now here we are and it turns out I'm the ultimate stupid. uwu
T
22:15
Thor
Have your other relationships just been guessing games like this with no communication?
L
22:16
Lyric
Well... in the past I guess it felt like the more I ask, the more I should've just known and not asked...
22:17
And I wasn't supposed to message too much without them replying first or I'd be smothering them and need to give them space ^^;
22:18
In retrospect it's... really weird.
22:18
And I didn't really realize how bizzare it was until just now, typing it out
T
22:19
Thor
Yeah that is super weird.
22:19
Like, I was asking for some pretty common basic stuff.
22:19
Hey pay attention to me, hey don't fuck around, hey let's do this at a normal pace.
L
22:20
Lyric
Yeah...
T
22:20
Thor
I think a lot of the times I'm overlooked because people think of my success or drive and assume i'm more high maintenance or demanding.
22:21
But I don't really want anything unusual.
L
22:21
Lyric
i think i understand more now.
22:22
I'm sorry for being slow and also for screwing things up.
T
22:23
Thor
Happens when you run faster than your head. Just gotta slow down.
22:25
I'm willing to give it another shot. However, you've really made me wary with all this.
L
22:25
Lyric
Thank you, I really appreciate it...
22:28
*nuzzles your arm*
T
22:29
Thor
*nips your neck*
L
22:29
Lyric
*wiggles a bit* >w<
T
22:30
Thor
Honestly I think the only -weird- thing I ever ask for us doing stuff to me when im sleeping c.c;;;
L
22:30
Lyric
It's not so hard to keep up with ^^
22:32
*lays on your lap* uwu
T
22:33
Thor
Mhh c.c;
22:33
Also you being in my lap gets me super turned on for some reason x3
L
22:34
Lyric
O-oh—...
22:34
I wonder why that is— *wags and looks at you curiously*
T
22:38
Thor
Huff
L
22:39
Lyric
Maybe it's because I can... *nuzzles at your legs—*
T
22:42
Thor
NNhhfff c.c;;;;
L
22:46
Lyric
*gives your thighs another gentle nuzzle before looking up at you~*
T
22:47
Thor
L
22:47
Lyric
*closes my eyes and gives your crotch a big sniff* u//w//u
T
22:48
Thor
L
22:49
Lyric
*rests my snout there for a time, relaxing and a bit oblivious to your reaction*
T
22:50
Thor
L
22:52
Lyric
*gives you a timid lick before looking up at you—*
T
22:53
Thor
Y...yes?
L
22:57
Lyric
N-nothing... you um... smell really good... *he smiles sheepishly up at you, a blush forming on his cheeks—*
T
22:58
Thor
I -reallly- like that x.x;
L
23:06
Lyric
*gingerly runs my tongue against your crotch again, still looking up at you—*
T
23:08
Thor
hhhhh
L
23:10
Lyric
I hope I'm not too distracting— *he presses his snout against your crotch unapologitically~*
T
23:10
Thor
I actually want you to distract me like this x.x;
L
23:11
Lyric
As long as there's space under your desk~
23:11
*gives you the gentlest nibble~*
T
23:12
Thor
My desk definitely has space under it ;3
23:12
I don't actually know how tall you are c.c;
L
23:15
Lyric
I'm 5'9"~!
23:15
or 69 inches if you're fancy :3
T
23:17
Thor
Shorter by 5 inches ;3
23:17
also
23:17
69
23:17
nice
L
23:20
Lyric
hey, i'm tall for my race ;v;
T
23:23
Thor
I'm 6'2" ;3
L
23:25
Lyric
Tall boye~
23:25
large in... multiple regards >///<
T
23:26
Thor
L
23:27
Lyric
*gingerly nudges the cloth to the side* u//w//u
T
23:28
Thor
L
23:29
Lyric
*places my tongue on your tip and gives a slow upward lick—*
T
23:29
Thor
Do you have an flist by the way? c.c
L
23:31
Lyric
I haven't really updated it but yeah ^^
T
23:33
Thor
Fave of hyenas hrm? ;3
23:34
23:34
Mustelids hrm?
23:35
This looks pretty spot on to me X3
L
23:35
Lyric
*Mustelidae >v>
T
23:39
Thor
mmhm
23:39
So me using Hyena stickers and having a ferret character
23:39
Definitely not -on brand- for you? ;3
23:39
23:40
Noticed oral isn't on here. Is it not something you've enjoyed much before? c.c
L
23:40
Lyric
erm...
23:40
... honestly i'm a pussy >w<
23:40
i like the idea of it but... in practice i'm really bad at it
T
23:40
Thor
Hrm?
23:40
Waddya mean? c.c
L
23:40
Lyric
i can't take it deep ;w;
T
23:40
Thor
You dont need ti
L
23:41
Lyric
but i -want- to
T
23:41
Thor
Hand on base, mouth on head, tongue movement c.c
L
23:41
Lyric
yeah... >w<
23:41
My experience is very limited when it comes to anything sexual. uwu
T
23:42
Thor
oh boy ;3
23:42
I get to train a doggo
L
23:42
Lyric
you'll have to be pretty patient with me >//w//<
T
23:43
Thor
Since you're submissive I can just take control and show you things c.c
L
23:43
Lyric
Y-yeah~!
23:43
It just... tends to hurt if you don't go slow at first >w<
T
23:44
Thor
Well yeah
23:44
That's a given
23:44
Plus it's not as fun if you rush it
23:44
And I don't finish... as... hard
23:44
unless I take it slow and build up
L
23:44
Lyric
... most of my experiences have been rather brief and painful uwu
T
23:45
Thor
oh
23:45
seriously?
23:45
Like forced too hard or?
L
23:45
Lyric
yeah ^^;
23:45
They weren't... forced, as far as me being willing
23:46
But in terms of how it went in, yeah it was somewhat forced in that regard.
T
23:46
Thor
Yeah that's no fun
23:46
That's why I was hoping you'd have your own room?
23:47
So we could take the needed time?
L
23:48
Lyric
Yeah...
T
23:48
Thor
Like
23:48
Needs a good hour
23:48
So do you think that will be possible?
L
23:49
Lyric
I can try~
23:49
Erm
23:49
That wasn't a very good answer
T
23:49
Thor
X3 no it wasn't
L
23:49
Lyric
Looks like there's some cheaper rooms but it's single days
23:50
I'm not sure about taking two seperate hotels, one for each day...
T
23:51
Thor
hum
L
23:51
Lyric
have you ever done something like that ^^;
T
23:51
Thor
Nope!
L
23:52
Lyric
I haven't really gone to many conventions so I'm really not sure about it
T
23:52
Thor
Well
23:52
If you have your own room for a night
23:52
I can come spend some of it with you c.c
L
23:53
Lyric
that would be nice... uwu
T
23:55
Thor
Have you ever topped before? c.c
L
23:55
Lyric
yeah, a couple times
T
23:55
Thor
If you really want me in the mood for that
23:55
Be the big spoon
23:55
That's about all you need to do
L
23:56
Lyric
mostly smooth sailing for me on that though no one has ever been able to make me cum
23:56
and oh—
23:56
thanks for the info uwu
T
23:56
Thor
Waddya mean nobody has been able to make you cum?
L
23:56
Lyric
like
23:56
i've never really orgasmed when i'm with anyone else
23:56
other than jacking myself off for a long time .w.
T
23:57
Thor
Even when you topped?
L
23:57
Lyric
mmhm
T
23:57
Thor
Like, being inside, didn't get you off?
L
23:57
Lyric
nop . 3 .
T
23:57
Thor
Hrm
23:57
That's kind of weird!
L
23:57
Lyric
yeah!
23:57
i'm jealous really =w="
23:57
of course it feels good
23:58
it just doesn't feel, like the best best thing ever, yknow?
T
23:58
Thor
Well, what does feel like the best thing ever?
L
23:59
Lyric
... being by someone's side. uwu
26 September 2018
L
00:00
Lyric
but if you mean sexually, I guess... recieving.
T
00:00
Thor
Does that get you close?
L
00:01
Lyric
not in my experience ^^;
00:01
it's a different kind of pleasure for me i think
T
00:01
Thor
When was the last time you did anything physically? o.o
L
00:01
Lyric
i dunno, can't really explain much—
00:01
erm............ several months ago
00:01
early july
T
00:01
Thor
You gotta get tested before we do anything!
L
00:01
Lyric
ovo
00:01
oke
T
00:01
Thor
Important!
L
00:02
Lyric
*nodnod*
T
00:03
Thor
Yeah since you had a recent partner
00:03
It's super important to get an STD test
00:03
Like even if you use condoms and such
L
00:04
Lyric
understood. uwu
T
00:04
Thor
No uwu ;3
00:04
Basic stuff!
00:04
Adult stuff!
L
00:05
Lyric
adult stuffff
00:05
yeah ^^
00:05
i don't feel like much of an adult because school is still f u c k i n g m e i n t h e a s s
00:06
but i guess i'm growing up now. uwu
T
00:06
Thor
School might be fucking you in the ass now but I will be in a month if you play your cards right.
00:06
L
00:07
Lyric
T
00:09
Thor
00:10
Also if you do get tested and everything is gooooood
00:10
00:10
Maybe
L
00:11
Lyric
u//w//u
00:11
sounds like a blast
00:11
>V>
T
00:12
Thor
Anyway c.c
00:12
I think you were... up to something ;3
L
00:13
Lyric
*nods and wraps my lips around your tip, suckling and looking up at you—*
T
00:13
Thor
Nhhhfuck c.c;
L
00:14
Lyric
*takes more of your shaft into his mouth as he wraps a paw around the base of your shaft, massaging it firmly~*
T
00:15
Thor
Ghhh... that's the best...
L
00:25
Lyric
*looks up at you as he takes you in more before starting to bob his head back and forth slowly, letting his slick tongue glide against your member~*
T
00:29
Thor
Nhh... and you thought you wouldn't be good at this c.c;;
L
00:32
Lyric
*closes his eyes and moans quietly, letting his tongue vibrate along your length as he wraps it around~*
T
00:42
Thor
*Slips his paws behind your head as his thighs press gently against you holding you to him. He murrls as your moans run through his length.*
L
00:59
Lyric
*squeezes the base of your length firmly and strokes up and down at the same time as he bobs~*
T
00:59
Thor
*Arches his back clearly coming closer to the edge.*
T
01:34
Thor
._.?
L
01:34
Lyric
(eep sorry)
01:35
*pushes down until your tip hits the back of my mouth, still stroking you firmly with his paw~*
T
02:14
Thor
mmhhhrrlllll
L
02:23
Lyric
*takes you into my throat, letting my throat constrict around your tip~* Mmph—
T
02:28
Thor
*Rolls his hips forward and presses himself into you hard. He growls softly before releasing into you. Streams of slick cum coating you throat.*
L
02:33
Lyric
*closes his eyes and swallows your cum, letting out a satisfied hum through my nose as he holds you in his mouth~*
T
02:51
Thor
Good boy ;3
L
03:03
Lyric
^//w//^~!
T
03:06
Thor
L
03:06
Lyric
wow
03:06
that's a lot of dabs
03:06
I gotta make sure to take #1
T
03:08
Thor
03:08
Sadness
L
03:08
Lyric
disappointment
03:09
also lower but equally important
T
03:10
Thor
lol
L
03:10
Lyric
woof~
L
03:57
Lyric
bed time for me. uwu 💝
T
03:58
Thor
hum
03:58
Wanna voice first?
L
03:58
Lyric
Sure~!
L
07:15
Lyric
good morning~
T
12:11
Thor
morning
L
12:46
Lyric
Hi Thor~!!
12:47
Sorry I passed out so quickly last night. I hope you figured out the alert stuff ^^
T
12:52
Thor
I mostly did
L
12:57
Lyric
that's good to hear~ Maybe I'll be able to pop in today and check em out~!
L
17:21
Lyric
Hey Thor~! Just got out of lab ^^
T
20:10
Thor
heyo
L
20:10
Lyric
Hiya~!!
20:10
How are you? ^^
T
20:11
Thor
speepy
20:11
gonna stream early
L
20:11
Lyric
Ooh excite~!
20:11
devstream?
T
20:12
Thor
yep
20:12
weekday devday
L
20:13
Lyric
*big wags* ^^
L
21:02
Lyric
*nuzzles your neck as you work* uwu 💝
L
22:51
Lyric
Bedtime soon... uwu
T
22:53
Thor
woof
22:53
You hear oscars music?
L
22:53
Lyric
No, I actually just got back home ^^;
T
22:53
Thor
Check stream ;3
L
22:54
Lyric
Oke coming now
27 September 2018
L
00:20
Lyric
the song sounded really nice ^^
00:20
like i said in stream it felt really fitting because it gave me vibes of mysticism, puzzling, and calculation
00:20
bed time for real now tho uwu
T
00:28
Thor
oki :3
T
07:29
Thor
mlehhhh
07:29
half awake
07:29
probably going to pass out again
07:29
*paws at*
L
09:43
Lyric
*nuzzlenuzzle*
T
12:05
Thor
c.c
L
15:35
Lyric
Good afternoon ^^
T
15:48
Thor
oh hey you're alive
L
16:08
Lyric
Yes, henlo~!! 💝✨
T
21:14
Thor
you a busy woof today
21:14
whqts been up?
L
21:15
Lyric
Trying to get into some game dev
21:15
and also homework
21:16
downloading unreal engine dev kit at the moment uwu
28 September 2018
L
01:25
Lyric
guess you're busy ^^;
01:25
time for bed uwu~ good night thor
01:25
sweet dreams when you do sleep!
T
03:29
Thor
I passed out at like 10pm
03:29
really needed sleep bad
03:29
passed out at my desk
03:29
rip
T
04:17
Thor
L
11:01
Lyric
morning~!! ✨
T
12:06
Thor
Mornin
L
14:15
Lyric
How are you doing? ^^
T
14:17
Thor
Trying to embed our stream on our website in a way that doesn't look like butts
L
15:09
Lyric
oh
15:10
your embed has static dimensions at 854 and your box around it uses 45%
15:16
maybe you already know how to handle that but if you don't, here's the value you might wanna change: https://youtu.be/ucfOsQ3XKOY
T
15:23
Thor
Nah it's fine for now, ill handle that later today
15:23
I need to build a proper layout for mobile
15:23
its just smash grab shit right now
15:23
since their embed requires certain dimensions
15:24
if its not in a specific range then it wont count viewers
15:25
And the width % is built into that CSS rule so ill make a different one when im more free
L
15:30
Lyric
oah oke~
15:39
In reply to this message
Also this is neat :0
T
15:42
Thor
yes
L
15:43
Lyric
uwu
15:43
*nuzzle*
T
15:43
Thor
*nuzzles back*
15:51
Just got bombed by that OAUTH dude
L
15:54
Lyric
same guy? stranqe? did he want something?
T
15:55
Thor
Nope
15:55
He dropped 450 follows on us
15:55
and 400+ hosts
15:55
I am talking to Twitch now
L
16:02
Lyric
yikes x.x
L
17:08
Lyric
Hey~
T
17:09
Thor
hey you
L
17:10
Lyric
I hope you had fun streaming, despite the little bump in the road. uwu
T
17:10
Thor
yep!
L
17:10
Lyric
that's just like you xP 💝
L
19:18
Lyric
Hey Thor, could I ask for some advice on something? :3
T
20:33
Thor
sure
20:33
whats up?
L
20:41
Lyric
I want to make a game engine based software that essentially plays back MIDIs with effects and stuff similar to my videos on YouTube. I want to use a game engine because I feel like it's a good groundwork for a graphics-based visualizer and it should be relatively efficient compared to traditional video compositing. The software would be very focused on aesthetics. Efficiency will be important as well, because, even though there will be an option to export videos, live playback would be a welcomed feature as well. I downloaded GameMaker Studio 2, Unity, and Unreal, and was planning to experiment with each one. I was wondering, based on your experience, which game engine do you think could be best utilized for my use case? (Doesn't have to be one of the ones I mentioned)
L
21:56
Lyric
sorry I wrote so much ^^;
T
21:57
Thor
You've said efficiency a lot here but that could mean a lot of different things.
21:57
Focus more on what you are trying to make the executable do
21:57
Not how -efficient- it is
21:57
Let me know what that is
L
21:58
Lyric
Ah you're right. Efficiency, I meant as in, can handle lots of stuff on the screen but specifically effects or particles at high frames.
22:01
(While also having high graphics quality, but I don't know how much that has to do with the engine I'm using)
T
22:02
Thor
That's not going to be on the engine in the slightest
22:02
That's going to be on the skill of the programmer
22:02
I can push GMS to have 30,000 physics objects emitting particles on screen at the same time
22:02
at 60fps
22:02
on a phone
22:02
So like
22:02
Engine is irrelevant
L
22:02
Lyric
Hm alright
T
22:02
Thor
You choose an engine based on limitation of functionality
L
22:04
Lyric
Hmm... Alright. Well, knowing the goal for my end product (simulating the videos I have on YouTube), would you suggest a particular engine?
T
22:05
Thor
When you say simulating the videos you have on YouTube I don't know what you mean
22:05
Simulating how
22:05
With what functionality
22:05
What you're missing here is a key step
22:05
A design doc
22:05
Detailing the functionality of your project
22:05
You've skipped that step
22:06
So now this doesn't make a lot of sense
L
22:06
Lyric
Oh~ I'll work on that then! ^^
22:06
Thanks Thor. uwu 💝
22:08
I'm feeling really under the weather tonight... I think I should head to bed...
22:08
Good night~ 💝✨
T
22:09
Thor
oh...
22:09
night then
22:09
hope you feel better
L
22:10
Lyric
Thanks Thor, good luck with tonight's stream~!!
29 September 2018
T
03:06
Thor
did you figure out your twitchcon stay logistics?
L
07:50
Lyric
... not yet. uwu
T
12:07
Thor
oof
L
12:07
Lyric
woof 'w'
T
20:26
Thor
*nuzzles*
L
20:32
Lyric
*nuzzles back tiredly~*
T
20:34
Thor
My wuff
L
20:42
Lyric
Yes, all yours~ u//w//u
20:43
Sorry the raid wasn't so big tonight. Unsurprisingly people seem less interested in homework than in music.
T
20:54
Thor
dont be sorry silly
L
21:00
Lyric
*hugs close~*
T
21:51
Thor
c.c
L
21:51
Lyric
i just beat my highscore on cob ;v;
21:51
9.3m uwu
T
22:00
Thor
heck ye
L
22:00
Lyric
someone has 2,147,483,647
22:00
🤔
T
22:22
Thor
yep
22:22
announced on stream today
L
22:22
Lyric
was that legit??
T
22:25
Thor
yes
22:25
2 hour long run
22:25
no spices
L
22:26
Lyric
woh nice
22:26
are you gonna make it posisble to get higher? :0
T
22:30
Thor
Can't steams leaderboards have that number as the integer cap
22:30
its not me capping it lol
L
22:30
Lyric
ohhh
22:31
i see uwu
T
22:35
Thor
c.c
L
22:36
Lyric
Is everything alright? >w<
T
23:34
Thor
yeah you just seem busies
23:34
hoping its not a repeat of before ._.
L
23:35
Lyric
but
23:36
I'm not that busy uwu
23:36
though I am laying down
30 September 2018
L
00:47
Lyric
and... now I'll be going to bed.
L
08:33
Lyric
and now I'm up~
T
09:15
Thor
welcome to the land of the living
L
13:11
Lyric
thanks thor ❤️
T
13:23
Thor
yee
L
13:23
Lyric
How are you feeling today~?
T
15:13
Thor
pretty good, just beat SoM
L
15:14
Lyric
Congrats~!! :3
L
18:28
Lyric
big preview https://youtu.be/YoqL-ehmlEc
18:29
been slowing down because— well the next song is gone in the night and i haven't arranged that yet
T
18:31
Thor
noice
18:31
im working on the Server room atm
L
18:31
Lyric
:0
18:31
i like server rooms
18:32
... i guess that's a pretty general statement
18:32
xP
T
18:33
Thor
working on the one in HB
18:33
come look!
L
18:34
Lyric
i've been watching xP
18:34
i chatted a bit owo
18:34
but mostly just watching. uwu
T
22:30
Thor
c.c
22:30
Miss you
L
22:30
Lyric
henlo~!!
22:31
i hope your night is going well~ uwu
T
22:31
Thor
Yeah its ok just crawling into bed now
22:32
Been wonky lately
L
22:32
Lyric
awh~ sleepy thor
22:32
wonky? you're finally getting to bed at a reasonable hour xP
22:32
even so, i hope you're not feeling too bad. do you feel ill?
T
22:35
Thor
Nah not ill just missing you and hoping you miss me
L
22:35
Lyric
I do... uwu
22:36
Of course I wish I could talk to you all day ;w;
T
22:40
Thor
then doooo it?
22:42
c.c
L
22:42
Lyric
but you're not on all day uwu
22:42
and if you are you don't always reply ;v;
T
22:42
Thor
I reply whenever I see your messages
22:43
and im less snuggly because im still getting over that shit the other day
L
22:43
Lyric
i understand uwu
T
22:44
Thor
I'm like equal parts "oh man he likes me and this is nice" and "hes probably doin other dudes" and "he rebounded and isnt interested now"
L
22:47
Lyric
;w ;
22:47
i really fucked up
T
22:48
Thor
So like reassure me here or?
L
22:48
Lyric
I... I really fucked up and I regret doing that stuff, seriously.
22:48
I do like you a lot
T
22:50
Thor
c.c
L
22:54
Lyric
... honestly, i feel a little intimidated
T
22:54
Thor
How so?
L
22:54
Lyric
i feel like i'm never really doing what you want and that you try to lead me to do something but inevitably disappoint you
22:55
i feel like i have to try really hard to get your attention but at the same time don't want to pester you
22:56
but... at the same time i feel like i could talk about anything with you. i'm comfortable when you're around.
T
22:56
Thor
Well to be real the only thing I want is your attention and affection. Sny feelings you are having on being unvalued or pestery are on your end because I super don't feel that way.
L
22:57
Lyric
I guess I kinda have a phobia in that regard then...
22:58
I'm glad we're talking about this.
T
22:59
Thor
Yeah it's why I brought it up, was hoping for this.
22:59
You seem to undervalue yourself and make assumptions about how other people will treat you or how they feel. Gotta step away from that and try things. Especially with me.
L
23:01
Lyric
Sounds like a plan... uwu
23:01
erm... just a quick question, does it... bug you when I use emoticons in the middle of serious text?...
T
23:02
Thor
Nope c.c as long as they make sense. Why do you ask?
L
23:02
Lyric
erm... my ex was really picky about that...
23:03
although i only learned that after months of him being upset at it...
23:03
i guess he wanted me to... assume what he thought of it without any indication.
T
23:06
Thor
Ahh see thats not a great way to go about things. You can't really apply specific likes and dislikes from past partners.
23:07
You can really only define new limits for what you are personally comfortable with.
23:07
If you worry about what your ex disliked in relation to me you're bound to make weird assumptions
L
23:09
Lyric
that makes sense—
23:09
I guess I... wasn't really realizing how much of an impression that it left on me.
T
23:11
Thor
Bad ones and early ones always do
23:11
its hard to unlearn training from terrible partners
23:11
Big thing with me is communication
23:11
Do it, constantly
23:11
its not bothering me
L
23:11
Lyric
oke~~
T
23:12
Thor
silence makes me worry
23:12
communication is good
L
23:12
Lyric
*nod nod*
23:12
I'll keep that in mind for sure ^^
T
23:15
Thor
So talk to me about how you feel c.c
L
23:16
Lyric
I feel like I want to make you happy
23:16
And... I feel like I want you to know that I want to make you happy
23:16
And I feel like that's confusing but that's also how it is
T
23:16
Thor
L
23:17
Lyric
;w ;
T
23:17
Thor
What else? ;3
L
23:17
Lyric
I feel like you're very kind and patient with me
23:17
I feel like you understand me
23:18
I feel like you understand me because you try to understand me which I feel very grateful for
23:22
I feel like I have a lot to learn from you, in many aspects.
T
23:23
Thor
23:23
I like this, makes me happy.
L
23:23
Lyric
23:23
I feel like I'm happy now too ^^
T
23:25
Thor
Keeeeep talkin ;3
L
23:26
Lyric
I feel like you don't know that I think about you a lot
23:26
I feel like you wonder about it but I think you don't know
23:26
But I feel like I wonder the same thing about you
23:27
This is very nice. uwu
T
23:30
Thor
Yeah I do wonder about that a lot. Not sure how into me you really are.
L
23:30
Lyric
I could tell you but I think it's better to show you. uwu
T
23:33
Thor
Show me? c.c Show me how?
L
23:33
Lyric
Well—
23:33
You like this, I think, so I could keep doing this!
23:34
telling you how i'm feeling uwu
T
23:37
Thor
Telll meeee c.c
L
23:37
Lyric
h-how i'm feeling?
23:37
Well, I'm feeling like I shouldn't have played so much osu today >_>"
23:39
But as far as us, I feel like... we're in a weird place
23:39
I feel like you don't know if I'm the one and I feel like I don't know if I'm the one either
23:40
I feel like you don't know if you know me enough because you,,, kinda don't, Even though I'm kinda just a simple dog, we haven't known each other for very long.
23:40
I feel like you haven't done this before with someone like me.
T
23:41
Thor
Hrm that's not how I feel actually. "the one" is a bit much. Right now i'm at the wonders that I posted before.
23:42
I have done this with someone like you before and last time it was a rebound and they did leave for someone else rapidly.
L
23:44
Lyric
Hmm...
23:45
I guess you must worry that I might be doing the same. Of course, I should know that since you have told me a couple times that you're worried I'm rebounding,
T
23:47
Thor
I am not worried because of past occurances though. I'm worried because of your actions.
23:48
Rapidly entering a sexual relationship, super emotionally attached immediately, suddenly having sexual stuff with another person, mood change from attachment to being distant. It appears unstable and wild as with any rebound.
L
23:48
Lyric
That makes sense...
23:49
I think... when I said I felt intimidated, I meant more specifically that I am scared to disappoint you.
23:50
I feel like if I don't agree with your pacing then you might become upset at me.
T
23:50
Thor
Well you going after another guy disappointed me. Nothing else has.
L
23:50
Lyric
Y-yeah...
23:51
I feel like I read into things too much sometimes
23:51
I've become paranoid not only about you but about everyone else, that I'm doing something wrong.
T
23:53
Thor
What did you mean by not agreeing with my pacing?
23:54
Like if you didnt slow down id be upset?
L
23:54
Lyric
Y-yeah...
T
23:54
Thor
I was mostly worried for your sake. I don't do things quickly so I didn't want you to get bored
23:55
but then you got bored and went looking elsewhere so rip that I guess
L
23:55
Lyric
I'm... sorry about that.
T
23:59
Thor
Soooo what do you want?
1 October 2018
L
00:00
Lyric
I want to talk with you more
00:00
And show you that you can trust me
00:00
Also happy October~!
T
00:02
Thor
No I mean what do you -want-
L
00:03
Lyric
I want... ... ... to be successful?
00:03
wow that was a terrible answer
00:03
I'm sorry, could you be specific?
T
00:05
Thor
With me c.c
L
00:06
Lyric
Right now, I want to... mean something to you.
T
00:07
Thor
You do mean something to me c.c
00:07
Or I wouldn't be talking to you
L
00:07
Lyric
That makes sense—...
T
00:07
Thor
If you didn't mean something to me I would definitely be gone.
L
00:07
Lyric
O-oh—...
00:08
,,, I would not like that. uwu
T
00:12
Thor
Well thats not the case so
00:12
What kind of relationship are you trying to have with me?
L
00:13
Lyric
I... guess I'm not sure. I just like to be around you, really. I don't really have a detailed plan for it...
00:14
I'm assuming you have more of an idea of what you want though.
T
00:15
Thor
Well I need to know what your ground rules are. Like what are your red flags and limits. Stuff you wouldnt want me to do?
L
00:15
Lyric
U-uh... don't... hit me?
00:16
It might seem stupid but I really just like to be around you. Knowing you I don't think you would do anything against me. Unless I'm missing the point here.
T
00:17
Thor
Well I'm never going to hit you x3
00:17
I mean like
00:18
For me, doing sexual stuff with someone else if I'm not involved is a pretty big not ok.
00:18
Do you not have limits on anything else?
L
00:18
Lyric
Sorry to seem dumb, but could you give a few examples?
T
00:21
Thor
Well I just gave a big one c.c
L
00:21
Lyric
R-right...
T
00:21
Thor
Hrmm
00:22
Sometimes it feels like you're interested in being a pet more than a partner c.c is that the case?
L
00:22
Lyric
wuh—
00:23
N-no, not really ^^;
00:24
Is... that what you want from me?
T
00:25
Thor
I'm asking what you want you submissive woof
L
00:26
Lyric
Well, I don't wanna be a pet :p
T
00:26
Thor
Alright thats out of the way then x3
00:26
You are being kinda cagey, you can tell me what you want. Its better if you do c.c
L
00:28
Lyric
Well
00:29
What I want in any relationship... as strange as it may sound, is just being there for each other through everything
00:29
which
00:29
sounds really stupid
00:29
because "duh" right?
00:29
but like i said i'm just a simple dog and that's what i can think of right now
T
00:29
Thor
Sounds normal and thats fine.
00:29
I need to know what you -dont want-
L
00:31
Lyric
I don't want there to be hesitation or tension between us. I wanna talk about everything even if it's uncomfortable
00:32
I don't want you to feel that you can't talk to me about something
00:32
ever
T
00:32
Thor
Good answer ;3
00:33
What else?
L
00:34
Lyric
This might seem very specific... but... I don't want you sticking up for me *just* because I'm with you
00:34
that might sound really weird but like
00:34
ech
00:34
i don't wanna feel like i owe you because you defended me irrationally or something
00:34
stay true yfeel?
00:35
obv if it makes sense to side with me then by all means
T
00:35
Thor
I won't ever do that actually. If you're in the wrong i'm always going to say so.
L
00:35
Lyric
but if there's no other reason then don't? hope that makes sense
00:35
oke uwu
T
00:36
Thor
What else?
L
00:36
Lyric
I don't want you to feel "stuck" with me
00:37
if we're in a relationship we should both be enjoying it
00:37
and if that ain't happening then it shouldn't be happening
00:37
i guess that goes hand in hand with the talking about anything part
00:37
but specifically about this
T
00:38
Thor
I don't feel stuck so thats good
L
00:38
Lyric
well we haven't gotten to the knot yet so
00:39
00:42
Erm... how about we hear one from you? :3
00:46
Did... you fall asleep with the screen on? :p
00:46
silly thor uwu
T
07:26
Thor
I passed out
07:26
Also
07:26
my big no nos
L
07:26
Lyric
Welcome to the land of the living room :3
07:26
well... I meant living. but this works too
T
07:26
Thor
you already know them
07:26
so
07:26
my big yes wants
07:27
are communication and sexy fun times
07:27
you do those things and im always gonna be happy
L
07:29
Lyric
well alright :3
T
07:29
Thor
Things spiral out badly if communication falls off
07:30
especially with you being so far
07:31
c.c
07:32
L
07:32
Lyric
Right... uwu 💝
07:33
I'll keep up with that ^^
T
07:33
Thor
Any concerns or things you do t like here? c.c
L
07:35
Lyric
Hmm...
07:36
Do you want a partner primarily for sex stuff?
T
07:36
Thor
Nope I just find it to be a integral trust bonding thing in the beginning
07:37
Means a lot, something important
L
07:37
Lyric
That's very fair. uwu 💝
T
07:39
Thor
Are you looking for multiple partners or an open relationship? c.c
07:42
07:46
If you are, thats fine, I just wamt it communicated
L
07:48
Lyric
Hmm... I've never had that sort of relationship before, so I'm not sure.
T
07:48
Thor
Well its stuff like what you did beforr
07:48
being with me but doing stuff on the side
07:49
when not communicated its shady and fucked up
07:49
but if I know about it im not worried
07:49
So it really comes down to
07:50
are you trying to be a monogamous woof or not? c.c
07:55
Busy woof.
L
07:58
Lyric
Well, driving woof. xP
08:00
... I guess I don't really know what I'm trying to be, per se.
T
08:00
Thor
Well, this is a really important question so I need an answer on it o.o
L
08:01
Lyric
Yeah for sure
08:01
Would it be ok if I think on it for a bit and let you know this afternoon? ^^
T
08:04
Thor
Kind of surprised you don't have an immediate answer. What specifically is making you want to think on it?
L
08:05
Lyric
Well
08:05
As I said before I hadn't really had any relationships like that
08:06
And it's because I've never really considered it heavily, I need to think how it will impact us now and in the far future.
T
08:06
Thor
And to be clear, im not asking for one way or the other im asking what you want lol
L
08:08
Lyric
I guess instead of thinking to myself we could talk it out
08:08
Do you have experience with that kind of relationship?
T
08:09
Thor
Nope not at all
08:09
But considering your actions I thought to bring it up.
08:09
Seems like you weren't getting something you wanted from me
L
08:10
Lyric
that's... actually really sweet of you to consider that just for me
T
08:12
Thor
Im not sure how frequently you do stuff like that or what your routine is
08:12
I also dont know if its strictly online or irl as well
L
08:14
Lyric
Well, I've been single most of my life
08:14
ok that doesn't mean much considering I'm 20, I'd hope I've been single most of my life >w>""
08:16
... I lost my train of thought, I don't even know what my point in saying that was.
08:17
I don't really have a "routine" >w>
08:18
I also realized I have no idea the logistics, as it applies to the future, of that sort of the relationship
T
08:19
Thor
I feel like you're dodging the question a bit. Do you regularly do sexual stuff with other people? Like one night stands in irl or rp online?
L
08:20
Lyric
Sometimes I rp but honestly it's only with close friends that I trust and I definitely wouldn't consider it "regularly"
08:20
And nothing irl
08:22
I have tried a hook up once (before meeting you >w>) but wow that really wasn't for me
08:22
It felt like such a huge waste of time
08:24
I wasn't really into it, it took so much time to set up and get there and it just wasn't good or worth it.
T
08:26
Thor
When you say sometimes you rp
08:26
how often?
L
08:27
Lyric
As I said, not regularly.
08:28
I am not sure what kind of answer you're looking for— but let me try
08:29
In September like once, August like once, in July none iirc
08:34
You seem intent on making things work with me. I really appreciate that. uwu
T
08:36
Thor
Watcha mean?
L
08:37
Lyric
Well, you have a pretty good reason to just not trust me again
08:37
But you seem to want to make it work.
08:37
I'm not sure if it's because you really like me or if that's just the way you are, but I still appreciate it either way.
T
08:42
Thor
Its a little of both and because I can understand a few dumb mistakes being young and not having talked about it prior
L
08:47
Lyric
*nodnod...*
T
08:48
Thor
Humm...
L
08:48
Lyric
*hugs* uwu 💝
T
08:53
Thor
*licks*
08:54
So whats got you on the fence about relationship style? I want to understand your thought process here.
L
09:01
Lyric
Well, I want to make the best decision, really. I guess I don't know how that sort of thing would play out in the future so I can't say if I think it'll be good.
09:02
Like would we live together? Would it be like one big relationship or a couple of singular relationships?
T
09:03
Thor
I think youre overthinking this
09:03
im asking if you want to keep doing side stuff with people when were together
L
09:04
Lyric
oh—...
09:05
I guess online, I would want to.
09:05
if... that's alright with you
09:07
It probably won't be very often. uwu 💝
T
09:08
Thor
What would your reasoning be to continue doing that online?
L
09:12
Lyric
I have a friend that I care very much about
09:13
uwu...
T
09:13
Thor
Humm
09:14
Yeah thats a weird thing for me because it shows me that im not that important to you? Like one of multiple or you may leave for this other person at any time.
L
09:14
Lyric
:c
09:14
You are important to me
09:14
I would stop for you. uwu 💝
T
09:14
Thor
You understand though right?
L
09:15
Lyric
Yes, I understand. ^^;
T
09:20
Thor
So why this person in particular if its so infrequent?
09:20
And is it someone you know irl?
L
09:21
Lyric
It's not irl ^^
09:21
It's kinda on their schedule, I tend not to really start that kinda thing
T
09:24
Thor
How often? o.o
09:25
And yeah what makes it a thing you would want to continue?
L
09:27
Lyric
I pretty much laid out how much I've done it~ Not very frequently.
09:27
And, I guess I want to continue it because I really care about them
T
09:30
Thor
So this was the person from the other day?
L
09:30
Lyric
like I said I'd be willing to stop
09:30
and yes
T
09:30
Thor
Bleh...
L
09:30
Lyric
... vwv
T
09:31
Thor
I mean if thats what you want then thats what you want but I really dont want to be a part of that?
L
09:31
Lyric
Yeah, I understand.
T
09:31
Thor
So what do you want to do?
L
09:32
Lyric
I... want to do what makes everyone happiest, but I don't know how to achieve that
T
09:33
Thor
Not what I asked lol
09:33
too vague
L
09:37
Lyric
I don't want to lose what you and I have.
09:37
I'll do what makes you comfortable with me.
09:51
uwu 💝
T
09:52
Thor
So whats your plan?
L
09:56
Lyric
Plan?... I guess I... don't... really have one? I'm not sure what you're asking, sorry.
T
09:56
Thor
Im asking for qhat youre going to do
09:56
talking about potential plans is cool
09:57
but I want a set in stone plan of what youre going to do in this situation
L
09:59
Lyric
For now I'll try to do online stuff less frequently, but I won't tell him off completely. At the same time I want you to understand that it's not because I'm bored of you or anything.
09:59
I don't want you to take it personally because that's not how it is.
T
10:02
Thor
Well I mean, it kinda is. Because if you were more interested in me this wouldn't even be a question.
L
10:04
Lyric
I suppose? But really it's not me starting stuff with him. I'm not seeking this kind of thing to happen. I'm not getting lonely and looking to hook up. That's not how it is.
T
10:05
Thor
The end result is the same though o.o
L
10:08
Lyric
It guess. But I think the mentality matters.
10:09
I'm not doing it because I'm disinterested in you.
T
10:09
Thor
The mentality on this doesn't matter much to me. Whether you are actively seeking it out or passively accepting it when it comes your way you're still hooking up with someone else.
L
10:10
Lyric
And if that's not ok then I'll do my best to minimize that
T
10:10
Thor
Minimize? What do you mean?
L
10:10
Lyric
Not doing it again.
10:11
That's all I mean by that
T
10:11
Thor
Minimize and never again are two way different things lol
L
10:12
Lyric
Well it's not a matter of what I say, it's a matter of what I do.
T
10:13
Thor
._.
L
10:13
Lyric
From what I understand, either way if it happens again you won't like it.
10:13
The mentality on that doesn't matter so much, right?
T
10:13
Thor
Well yeah if you want to continue stuff with me it has to stop.
10:13
Pretty sure I've made that clear?
L
10:13
Lyric
Alright.
10:14
That's fine.
10:14
I just don't appreciate you leading me down this weird path to interrogate me when you didn't really wanna consider accommodating for that in the first place.
10:15
Feels like you just wanted me to confess something or like you're trying to teach me a lesson.
10:16
Feeling like you should've just asserted that you don't want something like that and left it at that.
T
10:17
Thor
Nope not trying to get you to confess something or teach you a lesson. Wanted to know exactly what is driving you and what kind of person you are.
10:17
You're very caged off and don't communicate your feelings a lot of the time.
10:17
You wait for others to ask or pry so I had to.
L
10:17
Lyric
I'm not good at talking about myself.
10:18
It still doesn't feel good.
10:18
I guess I took it in a way that you were considering accommodating for that and maybe that was just a bad assumption on my part. I just *feel* led on.
10:19
and maybe it's because I'm not used to people asking things just to ask
T
10:19
Thor
I was never considering accomodating that and never said I was. I wanted to know what you were after so I could determine if I wanted to move forward. It's not deceitful in any way and I was upfront about it the entire time.
L
10:20
Lyric
I understand, and as I said, it was probably just a bad assumption on my part.
10:21
And it still feels bad, even if it's my fault. Surprisingly, knowing that it's my fault doesn't make me feel better.
T
10:21
Thor
Ugh...
L
10:21
Lyric
I was just
10:22
talking about how I'm feeling ok
10:22
not about who's right
T
10:26
Thor
It just doesn't really feel like you have my best interests in mind honestly.
L
10:27
Lyric
I said I would stop for you
10:27
I assured you that I didn't mean anything by it
10:28
I then told you again I would try my best to stop
10:28
I proceeded to talk about my feelings
T
10:28
Thor
You also told me your ideal situation would be to have both me and them?
10:28
So like
10:28
Pretty big conflict of interest dude.
L
10:29
Lyric
Of course there's a conflict of interest, but I expressed that I'd put aside my interests for yours.
10:29
That's literally the opposite of not having your interests in mind
10:29
We might have disagreements but you can't expect me to change my opinions for you
T
10:29
Thor
Never said you should change your opinions.
10:30
Man you are seriously on a totally different communication wavelength than me.
10:30
Passive statements like "I will try my best to stop" and "I will do my best to minimize that"
10:31
aren't hard statements of stopping the behavior
10:31
So forgive me for not taking them as such
L
10:31
Lyric
Well if your issue is with what I would prefer as a situation then that would be having a problem with my opinion.
T
10:31
Thor
I set a pretty clear standard here. I'm not ok with other people being involved. If that's a problem for you then I think we're done here.
L
10:32
Lyric
And to be fair I did say flat out that I wouldn't do it again multiple times.
T
10:32
Thor
Look, clearly you're not getting it.
10:32
I don't want you to change in any way
10:32
I want to know who you are and bail if you're deadset on behavior I wouldn't be ok with.
10:32
That's how this works.
10:33
That's how literally every relationship works dude.
L
10:33
Lyric
Well I think I've expressed that I'm literally not deadset on that behavior
10:33
But it doesn't seem enough for you?
T
10:33
Thor
You seem stuck on thinking im trying to change you or force different opinions on you and I have no idea where that shit is coming from.
10:34
You haven't though. You've said ideally you'd want to continue with him and then said you would diminish and reduce sexual interactions. Now you're saying you would stop.
L
10:34
Lyric
You stated that you don't feel like I have your best interests in mind because I told you that my ideal situation would be to have both you and him.
T
10:34
Thor
Correct
10:34
And that's 100% true
10:34
You know what my ideal situation would be?
10:35
You not doing this shit and being as loyal/interested as you stated when we met.
10:35
But you're not, so, rip.
L
10:35
Lyric
I said I'd minimize it. And that I'd try my best. Maybe you don't get it that I'm using that as meaning more, not less.
10:35
When I say I'll try my best that's not an excuse to fail.
T
10:36
Thor
It's passive and leaves the situation open to interpretation and slips.
10:36
Not interested in wishy washy.
L
10:36
Lyric
Well let's be clear then.
10:36
I flat out said multiples times that I would stop, and when I said I'd try my best, I meant that I would assure that it doesn't happen again.
10:37
I say what I mean and I mean what I say.
T
10:38
Thor
Well you have a hell of a roundabout way of saying what you mean.
L
10:38
Lyric
Only because you took it that way. >w>"
10:39
It's because you're trying to read me
T
10:39
Thor
No because you don't speak directly and i'm not trying to read you.
L
10:39
Lyric
There's always more than what I'm saying, isn't there?
T
10:39
Thor
You literally don't speak directly.
10:39
You leave things open to interpretation, you act timid in conversation, and you leave options when confronted.
L
10:39
Lyric
I said I'd try my best. What does that mean to you? That I wouldn't try my best?
T
10:40
Thor
It means that you leave open an opportunity to slip or fail. Doing your best doesn't mean it won't happen again.
L
10:40
Lyric
Ironically, saying it won't happen again doesn't mean it won't happen again either.
10:41
Obviously that wouldn't be ideal.
T
10:41
Thor
I really hate this.
L
10:42
Lyric
I seriously don't see why. I flat out told you I wouldn't do it again. I am reassuring you now.
10:43
I'm disappointing and upsetting you right now because I'm not timid and I'm not just going along with everything you say.
10:43
So why shouldn't I be timid?
T
10:44
Thor
This is clearly not going to work out
L
10:44
Lyric
Even so I don't understand your rationale...
T
10:44
Thor
Your interests are split and right now you're more interested in winning this conversation then you are in fixing the problem and making it up to me.
L
10:45
Lyric
I told you I would stop
10:45
I have told you that several times and I told you that I told you that several times as well.
10:46
I'm not aware of what other steps to take in fixing the problem.
T
10:46
Thor
You don't get it and at this point I don't want to explain it anymore.
L
10:50
Lyric
Well let's see. Either you have a problem with me doing it or you have a problem with what my idea of an ideal situation is.

If you still have a problem with me doing it then I told you that I wouldn't do it again. Then that shouldn't be the issue.

If you still have a problem with me wanting to do it then... Well, you assured me that you wouldn't want me to change my opinion. Even so, you could still have a problem with the idea of me wanting something like that even though I expressed I would put aside that idea, which seems to be what this is about.
T
10:51
Thor
Your ideal situation is directly against my best interests. Changing your mind isn't something I'm about so this isn't going to work.
L
10:52
Lyric
That makes more sense.
10:52
I feel a little better about it now.
T
10:53
Thor
It's not really about how you feel honestly.
L
10:53
Lyric
I know.
10:53
I guess I'm still a little used to talking about my feelings now, sorry.
T
10:53
Thor
To be real you don't seem to care about how I feel at all.
L
10:53
Lyric
I... do.
T
10:54
Thor
Anyway, hope that situation works out for you.
L
10:55
Lyric
... Alright.
T
10:55
Thor
You've shown me that other things are more important dude. What did you expect from me?
10:55
You seem surprised by this and it's nothing to be surprised about.
L
10:56
Lyric
I wasn't surprised. You dismissed it pretty bluntly and so I figured there wasn't much else you wanted to talk about.
T
10:57
Thor
Well I don't want to change your plans or mind. I want a partner that is in line with the same kind of relationship goals as me.
L
10:57
Lyric
That's fair and I agree with that.
T
10:59
Thor
You also don't seem to be taking this as any kind of big loss so.
11:02
To be real all of this conversation and your reaction here just show me you don't really care about me.
L
11:06
Lyric
I do care about you.
11:07
I wouldn't want to put aside my desires for you if I didn't
T
11:08
Thor
Meh...
11:10
You say that but it never really came across.
11:13
You don't seem to be paying much attention to this anyway so I'm just gonna go.
L
11:20
Lyric
I am in a lab right now sorry :\
11:21
I'm sorry it didn't come across that way.
T
11:21
Thor
Why are you sorry?
L
11:22
Lyric
Because I want you to be happy.
11:22
I don't think I'm right for you and the converse is evident as well.
T
11:22
Thor
Your words and your actions don't line up.
11:23
And I don't think you understand it's not just about being right for eachother or not. You've shown me a really negative side of you and I don't really want to talk to you after this.
11:23
You don't seem to care about it, just passive and accepting, like you have been with everything.
11:24
That's why you come across as uncaring.
L
11:24
Lyric
I... don't mean to be that way. I do care about you.
11:24
I don't know what I can say right now.
T
11:25
Thor
Like this whole time it hasn't been about fixing the situation, it's been about being the most right. And among all of that it's just been passive acceptance with little to no emotional backing.
11:25
Someone who cares doesn't do this.
11:25
So with that in mind, it shows that you really don't care about this that much.
11:25
Maybe because you have options, maybe because you just wanted a fling, who knows man.
11:27
The only thing I want to impart to you in this is that if you want someone to know you care then show it in your actions. You didn't here and it broke it completely.